100 Days of NO
So here we are. That fabled point in every American presidency that seems to mean more to our 24-hour news cycle than to any thinking American. The President’s first 100 days in office.
To say that this president has had to face serious challenges is a galactic understatement. President Obama has had to face challenges that no other president has faced since…well, maybe Kennedy, maybe FDR. Hell, maybe
Washington. He came into office with an economy in shambles, mounting job loss, mounting deficits, and two wars. On top of all of that, he now has to deal with a possible pandemic. So what has he done in those 100 days?
- Relaxed restrictions on embryonic stem cell research.
- Ordered the closing of the U.S. prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
- Ordered most U.S. troops out of Iraq and more U.S. troops into Afghanistan.
- Pushed through his economic stimulus plan, a mortgage relief plan, a second Wall Street bailout and his plan to redeem so-called toxic assets.
- Approved massive lending to struggling Detroit automakers.
And this is just a small sample. Regardless of what you think of the results (or if there have been any), the truth is that this president has done more in the first 100 days of his presidency than the previous president has done in the first 9 months (before 9/11). Meanwhile, what have we gotten from the Republican party? One hundred days of endless entertainment. The Dopes of Nope, the Generally Obsolete and Pathetic party, the Party of NO, they have given us some of the most side-splitting, wet-your-pants laugh inducing rantings, ravings, and everything else, that we have EVER seen. And I mean EVER. Let’s go through this cast of “Should Have Long Since Been Canceled from Prime Time Players”.
Sarah Palin
The gift that keeps on giving (or simply, THE GIFT). When I say my prayers at night, I thank God that John McCain gave us this reject from the Hee-Haw cornfield and her family. Her own campaign was comic gold itself, with her disastrous news interviews (I can’t believe she couldn’t name ONE newspaper), her lack of knowledge of foreign policy, her lack of knowledge of the constitution as it applies to the Vice Presidency, her own troubles at home (Troopergate, anyone?). Then there’s the family, particularly the Baby-Daddy drama playing out with daughter Bristol and her one-time fiancé Levi Johnson. This drama is playing out more like an episode of Jerry Springer. Forget VP, can you imagine her as President. Comparing this family to the Obamas is like comparing the Beverly Hillbillies to the Huxtables.
John Boehner, Eric Cantor
Along with senator Mitch McConnell, they make up The Three Stooges of the GOP. When Obama called them out on the issue of the budget, they took up the challenge…well, kinda. First they came up with what Boehner would call “the budget”. Except that, much to the surprise to the press corps present at the time, it contained absolutely no numbers. Well, it did have one number regarding (drumroll please) tax cuts. Boehner’s explanation was that it was merely a budget blueprint, again to the surprise and chagrin of the press, liberal and conservative, that was present. A week later, they came back with another budget. This time with numbers, numbers that equated to just one thing, MORE TAX CUTS FOR RICH PEOPLE. In fact, an even bigger tax cut than Bush gave them. What would transpire next is a study in guffaw- inducing irony. Not only was this budget rejected by Democrats, 38 Republicans said NO to it. It would appear that the GOP is nothing if not consistent.
Michelle Bachman
She’s the Crazy Cat Lady of the GOP. The rantings coming from her are nothing short of legendary. Here’s the short list from the Bachman paranoid hit parade.
- She said on national TV during the campaign that members of congress should be investigated and exposed as un-American (she would spend the rest of the campaign thereafter denying she even said it).
- ACORN was under federal investigation (it isn’t).
- The stimulus bill would ration health care and direct funds away from Republican districts (it doesn’t).
- The president plans to use the census to keep Democrats in power for up to 40 years (at the rate the GOP is imploding, he won’t need the census for that).
- Carbon Dioxide is harmless because it occurs naturally (so does a yeast infection), and it makes up 4% of the Earth’s atmosphere (it actually makes up .0384%).
- Obama wants to force kids into liberal “re-education” camps.
- While trying to blame Obama for the Swine Flu epidemic (What?! Not the homosexuals?! I’m insulted!) she claims that the last Swine Flu epidemic occurred under President Jimmy Carter, when it actually occurred under President Ford.
- She blamed FDR for bringing on the depression through the Hoot-Smalley tariffs, which are actually called the Smoot-Hawley tariffs, authored by Republicans Reed Smoot of UT, and Willis Hawley of OR, and signed into law by previous president Herbert Hoover, also a Republican.
That this woman is allowed to roam freely without adult supervision, operate motor vehicles, carry a firearm, author and vote on legislation is terrifying enough. What’s more terrifying is that there are people in MN who ACTUALLY VOTED HER INTO OFFICE.
Michael Steele
Elected chairman of the Republican National Committee, he has been pretty much the Steppin-Fetchit of the GOP. This buffoon has yet to fail in putting his foot into his mouth up to his knee whenever he opens it. Since becoming chair he has…
- Announced an “off the hook” PR offensive to attract young African-American and Hispanic voters (and one-armed midgets) by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings”.
- Become one of three Republicans to apologize to Rush Limbaugh after pissing him off.
- Had to back track on a GQ interview where he indicated that abortion was a “choice” while homosexuality was not.
- Claim that global warming was a myth based on the “fact” that Greenland was once “green”.
And the result of this brilliant leadership? The Republicans lose a special election they should have won (NY-20), he’s had one high-profile defection from the party (welcome aboard, Senator Spector), and no less than 3 people have called for his resignation. Not a very auspicious beginning for the party’s first African-American chair.
Virginia Foxx
While the rantings of others on this list are merely stupid and amusing, the pure ignorance and subsequent non-apology coming from the NC Representative is just plain cruel. According to the Associated Press, Representative Foxx, while debating a hate crimes bill in the House, called the Matthew Shepard beating a hoax.
Matthew Shepard was a Wyoming college student who, in 1998, was lured from a gay bar, robbed and beaten, then tied to a post and left for dead. The suspects who are now serving time for this crime admitted to prosecutors that he was targeted because he was gay, although no motive was ever determined during their trial. However, here is the representative’s take on this.
“We know that young man was killed in the commitment of a robbery. It wasn’t because he was gay,” Foxx said during debate. “The bill was named for him, the hate-crimes bill was named for him, but it’s really a hoax that continues to be used as an excuse for passing these bills.”
What was worse was that Matthew Shepard’s mother was in the chamber when all of this was being said. Later when called on this, she issued the standard non-apology apology.
“The term ‘hoax’ was a poor choice of words used in the discussion of the hate crimes bill,” Foxx said in a statement. “Mr. Shepard’s death was nothing less than a tragedy, and those responsible for his death certainly deserved the punishment they received.”
She further goes on to blame her misstatements on a 2004 ABC News story, which emphasized Shepard’s robbery rather than the motive. By the way, the Hate Crimes bill that she was arguing against passed in the House.
Talking Heads
Then there are the right-wing pundits and self-proclaimed prognosticators who fill our televisions and airwaves with their idiocy, paranoia, and general nonsense. You have the GOP Al-Jezera network, otherwise known as FOX News, featuring Bill O’Rielly, Sean “I promised to waterboard myself but I’m too punk-assed to do it” Hannity, Glenn “Tammy Faye” Beck. And on the airwaves we have the Dark Lord of the GOP, Rush Limbaugh.
Such fealty and loyalty this Oxy-Cottin addicted blowhard demands from his subjects (called “dittoheads”) that he is feared even by the GOP itself. So much so that three of its prominent members actually apologized for criticizing him. Take these “before and after” statements from GA Congressman Phil Gingrey, SC Governor Mark Sanford, and RNC Chair Michael Steele.
Steele before:
Rush is not the head of the Republican Party. He’s an “entertainer” whose show is “incendiary” and “ugly.”
Steele after:
“My intent was not to go after Rush - I have enormous respect for Rush Limbaugh…”
“I was maybe a little bit inarticulate… There was no attempt on my part to diminish his voice or his leadership.”
“I went back at that tape and I realized words that I said weren’t what I was thinking…”
Gingrey before:
“I mean, it’s easy if you’re Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh or even sometimes Newt Gingrich to stand back and throw bricks. You don’t have to try to do what’s best for your people and your party. “
Gingrey after:
“I clearly ended up putting my foot in my mouth on some of those comments and I just wanted to tell you, Rush, [...] that I regret those stupid comments.”
Sanford before:
“Anybody who wants [President Obama] to fail is an idiot, because it means we’re all in trouble…”
Sanford’s Communications Director after:
“the governor was not referring to anyone “ in particular…””
His “I hope [Obama] fails” campaign has become the rallying cry for the right-wing. He claims over 20 million people listen to his show daily. All of them to hear his blind unreasoning tirades against Obama, against Democrats, against liberalisim, against…well, whatever gets his drawers in a knot that day. However, like the rest of the right-wing talking-asses, he is merely a stone thrower. He has no real ideas, and contributes nothing meaningful to the political discussion, only anger and vitriol, which is like manna for the right-wing nutjobs who listen to him.
21 Percenters
Finally there are the right-wing nutjobs themselves, the 21% of the country (according to latest polling) who still openly admit to being Republican. While the rest of the country is concerned with the economy, the environment, wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and rule of law, these so-called “real Americans” are concerned with fist-bumps, handshakes, bows to Saudi royalty, birth certificates, and teleprompters. Oh, I almost forgot…and teabagging.
The ridiculous Obama hate-fest which, according to organizers, was attended by 260,000 raging righties across the country (a number which, given the organizers propensity towards exaggeration, should probably be taken with a grain of salt), was supposedly about tax increases. That would be tax increases that wouldn’t take effect until 2011 (when the Bush tax cuts expire), and wouldn’t effect any of the protesters (who, in fact, would see a tax cut and are now receiving tax credits). Instead, it was a regurgitation of every right-wing talking point from teleprompters to birth certificates, socialism to communism to fascism. You name it, they bitched about it. It was also billed as a “grass roots” movement. However, several groups tied to prominent Republicans like Newt Gringrich and Dick Armey have sponsored some of these so-called “tea-party” events, and they were heavily promoted by FOX News.
So there you have it. One hundred days of wacky GOP antics. While various commentators and pundits give Obama grades ranging anywhere from A- to maybe a C, I’ll personally give the Generally Obsolete and Pathetic party an A+ for sheer entertainment. Don’t ever change, righties. Keep on playing the obstructionists. Keep harping on non-issue issues like teleprompters and sleeveless dresses. Keep pushing people like Sarah Palin and Bobby Jindal as the new faces of your party. Keep electing asylum escapees and bigots like Michelle Bachmann and Virginia Foxx. Keep trying to divide the country with “culture war” issues like abortion and same-sex marriage. Keep letting people like Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck be the representatives of your ideology. Keep clinging to your guns and your bibles, remaining blind to the world around you. And most of all, keep saying NO to every thing Obama proposes, and hoping that Obama fails, and throwing mega-tantrums when he succeeds. While the rest of the country moves on to the important issues, you’ll have another 1360 days (or perhaps 2820) to do what it seems the only thing you are capable of doing nowadays, keeping us entertained.
Michelle Bachmann Blames “Hoot-Smalley” for Great Depression
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/04/historian-michele-bachmann-blames-fdrs-hoot-smalley-tariffs-for-great-depression.php
Rep. Virginia Foxx retracts word “hoax” in Matthew Sheppard murder
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2009/04/matthew-shepard-virginia-foxx-gay.html
